Smile & Laugh 01 (May 08 - Oct 08)

[winston]

1) I've merged the "Play Play" thread with the "Smile & Laugh" thread

2) I've moved Cherry's post, 'A Mother's Letter" into the "Life" thread

[winston]

Shhhh! Quiet copulation key for female chimps
Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:42pm EDT; By Michael Kahn

LONDON (Reuters) - Female chimps keep quiet during sex to keep other females from finding out and punishing them for mating with the best males, British researchers said on Wednesday.

The study of chimp copulation calls also found that females seem more concerned with having sex with as many mates as possible rather than just finding the strongest male as a way to confuse paternity and secure future protection for offspring.

"They are trying to make the high-ranking males think they are the father," said Simon Townsend, an evolutionary psychologist at the University of St. Andrews in Britain, who led the study. "If you confuse paternity, they are more likely to provide that female with future support."

The findings show that chimps -- our closest living relatives -- can use their calls flexibly in response to social factors while knowing more about the apes could help in conservation efforts, he added.

Researchers have long been interested in mating calls of different animals, especially primates. A common hypothesis is that females use such calls to advertise to prospective males they are ready to mate, which in turn incites competition that leads to the strongest partner and highest quality offspring.

But it appears the female chimps are also a touch more savvy about the opposite sex, according to the findings published in the journal PLoS One.

"The female chimps we observed in the wild seemed to be much more concerned with having sex with many different males, without other females finding out about it, than causing males to fight over them," Townsend said.

The team, which included researchers from the Max Planck Institute in Lepzig, took urine samples from females in a group of about 80 chimps under observation in the Budongo Forest in Uganda able to show when the animals were fertile.

They also recorded the mating behavior and saw that the female chimps called out for sex partners for as many as 12 days during their reproductive cycle, even though they were only fertile for about 4 days of it.

Yet they also only called out about a third of the time when mating, much less than other primates. Low-ranking females were also more likely to keep quiet during sex, probably to keep female competitors at bay, the researchers said.

"We think that by being quiet, you are less likely to incite aggression from other females," he said in a telephone interview.

[kennynah]

quite different for homosapiens...it seems.... have u tried walking along the corridors within some of the more seedy hotels? one can imagine very high pitched er-hu in concert

[millionairemind]

K - FULLY UNDERSTOODED..

I once worked in Henan province in 2001. The only hotel near the workplace was a "brothel in disguise". The reason y I said that was I remember on the 5th floor there is an "entertainment center aka massage parlour" which is open only at 10pm and closed at 6am. Go figure!

The walls in the hotel rooms are so thin you cannot imagine what you hear at night

[millionairemind]

K9 is for assistance
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.

Putting her face in her hands, she moaned: "I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman!"

[millionairemind]

Signs and notices
These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations across the United States and rest of the world.

Found written on the wall in front of a photocopier of a company going through hardships : " DOUBLE YOUR PLEASURE - XEROX YOUR PAYCHECKS "

At a car dealership in Maryland to announce new seat belt legislation: "Belt your family. It's the law."

Seen while traveling in the Yucatan Peninsula: "Broken English spoken perfectly"

At an Applebee's restaraunt: "NOTICE: AFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY! A new 6% tax will be charged for the cost of collecting taxes!"

Fitness Center sign: "Self Esteem is feeling good about yourself - regardless of the facts."

[winston]

Loo for ladyboys

Thursday, June 19, 2008

A secondary school in rural Thailand has designed a new bathroom for its cross-dressers.

Kampang School in northeastern Thailand found last term that more than 200 of its students considered themselves transvestites, said school director Sitisak Sumontha.

When classes resumed in May, it unveiled a unisex restroom designated by a half male, half female human figure.

ASSOCIATED PRESS

[winston]

Chinese? Well you're black
Thursday, June 19, 2008

A Johannesburg court has issued a landmark ruling classifying Chinese South Africans as black, making them eligible for new benefits.

The high court ruling came after the Chinese Association of South Africa challenged their exclusion from laws aimed at redressing economic imbalances under the country's white-minority rule, which ended in 1994.

CASA argued that Chinese citizens continue to be marginalized under black economic empowerment and affirmative action legislation. Both laws benefit the black, Indian and mixed-race communities.

"As Chinese South African, we were officially classified as `colored' during the apartheid era, and suffered under the same discriminatory laws prior to 1994," CASA chairman Patrick Chong said. "The logical inference was thus Chinese South Africans would automatically qualify for the same benefits afforded to the colored group, post 1994."

AGENCE FRANCE-PRESSE

[winston]

Actually, I've never seen such names on the menu in China..

=========================================

"Kung pao chicken" made official for Olympics
Wed Jun 18, 2008 2:11pm EDT

BEIJING (Reuters) - It's official. Hungry foreign hordes craving a fix of diced chicken fried with chili and peanuts during the Beijing Olympics will be able to shout "kung pao chicken!" and have some hope of getting just that.

As it readies for an influx of visitors for the August Games, the Chinese capital has offered restaurants an official English translation of local dishes whose exotic names and alarming translations can leave foreign visitors frustrated and famished.

If officials have their way, local newspapers reported on Wednesday, English-speaking visitors will be able to order "beef and ox tripe in chili sauce," an appetizer, rather than "husband and wife's lung slice."

Other favorites have also received a linguistic makeover.

"Bean curd made by a pock-marked woman," as the Beijing Youth Daily rendered the spicy Sichuanese dish, is now "Mapo tofu." And "chicken without sexual life" becomes mere "steamed pullet."

According to one widely repeated story, the Chinese name of "kung pao chicken" comes from the name of an imperial official who was fed the dish during an inspection tour.

With the Beijing Olympics 51 days away, a notice on the city tourism bureau website ( http://www.bjta.gov.cn ) told restaurants to come and pick up a book with the suggested translations.

In China, where meetings are almost as popular as banquets, agreeing on the English-language menu has taken many rounds of discussions over previous drafts since last year.

Just as predictably in this country where nationalism and the Internet make a potent brew, controversy has already broken out over the blander new translations.

""I don't like this new naming method, it's abandoning Chinese tradition," one Internet comment declared. "There are many stories in the names of these dishes."

[millionairemind]

Sleeping on the job
Things To Say If You Get Caught Sleeping At Your Desk

9. "Actually I'm doing a "Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan" (SLEEP) I learned it at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend.

8. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress."

7. "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."