Smile & Laugh 06 (Aug 10 - Oct 11)

[winston]

Hospital Rules

Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student aide, Sam found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn’t need Sam’s help to leave the hospital.

After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let Sam wheel him to the elevator.

On the way down Sam asked him if his wife was meeting him. I don’t know,” he said. “She is till upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.”

[winston]

The old man had died.

A wonderful funeral was in progress and the town’s preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was.

Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, “Go up there and take a look in the coffin and see if that’s your pa.”

[winston]

Baby Jokes ::

Three men were discussing at a bar about coincidences.

The first man said, " my wife was reading a "tale of two cities" and she gave birth to twins"

"That’s funny", the second man remarked, "my wife was reading 'the three musketeers' and she gave birth to triplets"

The third man shouted, "Good God, I have to rush home!"

When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, " When I left the house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty Thieves"!!!

[winston]

Family Jokes

A man and his wife were sitting in the living room discussing a “Living Will”

"Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."

His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all the beer.

[winston]

An Irish Toast

May you be in heaven 10 seconds before the devil knows you’re dead.

[tonylim]

Senility

An elderly man went to his doctor and said, 'Doc, I think I'm getting senile.. Several times lately, I have forgotten to zip up.'
'That's not senility,' replied the doctor. 'Senility is when you forget to zip down

[behappyalways]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dq_qhEAa ... re=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbGVuRVI ... re=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xcq8QJgC ... re=related

[winston]

Did you here about the guy who lost his whole left side?

He's alright now!

[Muhajir]

DUDE, Where is the QE????

[behappyalways]

Like A Boss

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NisCkxU544c