Smile & Laugh 01 (May 08 - Oct 08)

[millionairemind]

Ah Lian called Ah Beng over the telephone

Lian: "Beng, I can't get my new jig saw puzzle fixed, mah-chiam all the edges cannot fix together, leh."
Beng: "Jig saw puzzle si mi picture, ha?"

Lian: "The box show a big rooster, kanna like the one in talkingcock.com".

Beng: "Okay, lah, okay, lah. I come over to hepchu, lah."

Ah Beng arrives at Ah Lian's place, where she happily leads him to the kitchen table where the jigsaw puzzle is.

Ah Beng examines the puzzle and says, "Kan ni na, put back the corn flakes into the box, lah."

[millionairemind]

Ah Beng - NEWSTUFF
********************

Ah Beng bought a new mobile.
He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said,
"My Mobile No. Has changed.
Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610"

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Ah Beng : I am a Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend: Really, what is he studying.
Ah Beng: No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.

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Ah Beng : Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
Ah Beng : Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.

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Ah Beng : If I die, will u remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Ah Beng : No, I'll also stay with your sister.

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Ah Beng : People consider me as a "GOD"
Wife: How do you know??
Ah Beng : When I went to the Park today, everybody said,
Oh GOD! U have come again.

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Ah Beng complained to the police: "Sir, all items are missing,
except the TV in my house."
Police: "How the thief did not take TV?"
Ah Beng : "I was watching TV news..."

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Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying "Parking Fine"
He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole "Thanks for complement."

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How do you recognize Ah Beng in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases
the board.

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Once Ah Beng was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other.
So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast
announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would
be hot.

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Ah Beng in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and
Says "Hello, how did you know I was here?"

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Ah Beng : Why are all these people running?
Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup
Ah Beng - If only the winner will get the cup, why others running?

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Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense
Ah Beng : The future tense is "u will go to jail"

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Ah Beng told his servant: "Go and water the plants!"
Servant: "It's already raining."
Ah Beng : "So what? Take an umbrella and go."

================================================== ===
A man asked Ah Beng why Ahmad Badawi goes walking in the Evening and not
in the morning Ah Beng replied Ahmad Badawi is PM not AM

[millionairemind]

Ah Beng at the national elections

On the voting day for the national elections, Ah Beng went into the polling booth to vote for the party he had chosen. There were two parties contesting in Ah Beng's area. One party had a tree as their symbol and another one a Bull. After 30 minutes in the booth, Ah Beng finally came out smiling and happy he had fulfilled his election responsibilities. Because he took so long, there was a long queue waiting outside the voting room. Ah Lian was rather upset with Ah Beng and complained, “ Ah Beng, why did you have to take 30 minutes to vote for your party ? There was a large crowd waiting for you to finish ”. Ah Beng replied, “ Why do you complain so much. It is not so easy to draw a bull, you know ? 30 minutes very fast already”.

[millionairemind]

Saw the joke below at another forum.. tot it was quite funny

A passenger plane on a cross-country trip runs into a terrible storm.
The plane gets pounded by rain, hail, wind and lightning.

The passengers are screaming. They are sure the plane is going to crash and that they are all going to die.

At the height of the storm, a young woman jumps up and exclaims, "I can't take this anymore! I can't just sit here and die like an animal, strapped into a chair. If I am going to die, let me at least die feeling like a woman. Is there anyone here man enough to make me feel like woman?"

She sees a hand raise in the back, and a muscular man starts to walk up to her seat. As he approaches her, he takes off his shirt.
She can see the man's muscles even in the poor lighting of the plane. He stands in front of her, shirt in hand and says to her, "I can make you feel like a woman before you die. Are you interested?"

Eagerly, she shakes her head, Yes!

As the man hands her his shirt, he says, "Here. Iron this”

[LenaHuat]

Read this in the hardware forum abt the 4th university and maybe a Liberal Arts College at NUS:

so summary =
new uni provide (i) Design and Architecture, (ii) Engineering and Applied Sciences, and (iii) Business and Information Technology
and LAC might provide liberal arts?

actually what is liberal arts abt? is it like arts and crafts in sec school, painting drawing and all that? and then the teacher decides whether your drawing is nice or u suck at it?

[iam802]

Philosophy would be a good subject for Liberal Arts.

I really like to 'philosophize'. Can one ever be wrong in such a subject?

[kennynah]

guess who left this foot print behind?



yes....u r smart....belongs to him.... ((edited to change the gender...as pointed out by ah lena... this fuwa is Ying Ying....supposedly a male fuwa....yingying...hmmm.... a little too effeminate for a male fuwa, imo))

[LenaHuat]

Ah Ken
Sori, I think this 'fuhwa' is male. He represents the Tibetan antelope.
Ok, I will double-check now.

iam802
Yes, this college should also incorporate 3Age education. Philosophy is definitely LA.

[kennynah]

san mei mei...this one for you.... top line advertising...guarantee sales will rocket...

[kennynah]

here u r...liberal arts...